12 April 2015

cannot draw

So, I have been attempting to draw anime... I have been told that a person's worst critique is usually themselves but.... I cannot draw anime. I can animate, I can paint and draw many different things, just not people. In due time, off I get drunk enough to get past my own worst drawings and do something, I will start the smiles episodes as I have been trying to. It may not be good but at least I did something besides manage a convenience store. My book, however, will not be published until I can get a better computer that will let me do so.

Dealing with new people at work who do not do anything sucks. Almost had him quit. I know his mommy stopped him from doing so.

Maybe I'll start off horrible and later and later become good or better at it. Still have 12 people who are willing to be voices... wish I had an artist who can draw people though....

Thank you and goodnight....

19 March 2015

current assessment of the situation

I've been thinking about lately. I hope to find my path by going to college outside of this state. I am also working on a way to publish my next book and my next animation. Somewhere down the line I'll be creating something stupid for people to not watch. Thank you and goodnight.

12 March 2015

stuck once more

Finished my second book... working on the third but I do need a new computer in order to upload the contents. So I have to decide if it would be worth buying a new computer or fixing my old one.

Working on a way to get the trailer, or rather trying to find time for it. Creating an office takes time which I do have but am not willing to use just yet. I've been feeling a little sick, and putting in over time and working six days a week makes me just want to sleep and rest on my days off.

One final detail. I have a small video to upload when I can. I gay baby ducks and chickens and sheep to show off.. they're so cute, just need to figure out my problem with the computer and it will work... that and my "alien" video... Lol.

Thank you and good night.

24 February 2015

towards the spring

I know stop putting is closer by than I had imagined when I have both baby ducks and sheep to look after. When I post the footage, don't look at them as just dinner, look at them as new life being brought into this world as I do... though they may be dinner soon... not my first goat, I love that goat...

17 February 2015

learned lessons so far

So what I have learned this week. Publishing short stories in journals and magazines is easy... trying to publish or rather learn how to publish a real novel is harder than I thought... running through all the ones who want to be paid upfront and then going through those who look at my work and say oh well is hard. I can write five thousand words and more in a day while sober, being drunk I write nearly ten, so when one book is finished and I send it in, no one wants it... So I go back to the Amazon thing witch has given me nothing...wish someone out there will like what I wrote....

learned lessons so far

So what I have learned this week. Publishing short stories in journals and magazines is easy... trying to publish or rather learn how to publish a real novel is harder than I thought... running through all the ones who want to be paid upfront and then going through those who look at my work and say oh well is hard. I can write five thousand words and more in a day while sober, being drunk I write nearly ten, so when one book is finished and I send it in, no one wants it... So I go back to the Amazon thing witch has given me nothing...wish someone out there will like what I wrote....

09 February 2015


Well, most recently I came to understand my issues.... I'm a drunk in a sense... Meaning I drink but not just anything, it has to be whiskey, the whiskey I like. Which is the meaning to my next book (have yet to publish it... still working on errors...) yeah I'm like that, mostly with names and titles...

So, I digress... tomorrow I start work with my office, I work on my car...next day I do taxes and then buy groceries and then some more work on the office and my car... publish My next book at sometime in that time frame... maybe work on lyrics for a instrumental my friend (if that friend is willing to sing, or to my bad voice if I am drunk enough for it) for the next animation I'll create... Anyways...

I forgot what this was supposed to be about, even though I've read it several times over....

Wrote the second book and started on the third... learning and understanding how this damn touch screen works...(To explain about this touch screen, it changes words on me.... instead of a simple word like "work" it keeps trying to put the word "with".... don't attempt using while drunk...just saying....) I don't like the new Windows, I will get an Apple product I think. Or  fix my computer.... not sure which is cheaper.. Anyways, need a new computer to post better crap...  or fix mine since mine is totally awesome......

Thank you and good night......

My touch screen doesn't have any USB port... fucking computer cannot understand the word "USB"... keeps trying to make it "sub"... miss my computer... hate Windows... kindle is good for stupid games and random books but not a lot...
. People wonder why I have four books... (kept trying to change the number to the word"for")... totally sucks.... can people not b able to spell? Seriously, new green sucks..... "Cray-Cray" the fuck man... . The fuck....

Oh and, still will not allow me to break these paragraphs like they should.....

03 February 2015


My next book is done, though the answers to which they are not publish may seem like just excuses .... my internet seems to not what communicate with me properly...or u may be too drunk to know how to use it correctly ....Anyways, will pull lush soon .....

01 February 2015

several computers

So, I use several computers for various different reasons add many who understand my plight might understand. Tried using my writing computer to record my voice, to did not work.... that computer decided not to find the applications needed for such an act... still finding out hard to type... Anyways, so I switched to the computer designed for animations... does not work. My computer for music works, though not my choice to just record random crap I say. Hoping all would hear what I sound like.... maybe when I am sober enough to use it yet drunk enough to not care hear it..... Lol.... well more updates later........

31 January 2015

New office

If all goes according to plan, sometime in the next month I will start working on building a new office space for myself. This is all thanks to the side work I have been doing along with a few donations made by my fellow peers at work. Really good friends too. Hopefully, the completion of this office will give way to new and better ideas and, quite possibly, the continued work of my animations and so on... Better yet, maybe using actual words rather than using instrumental music, though music with lyrics would be grand as well. Whatever it may be, I hope to expect more work to continue along the way. Will post pictures as the office develops. Anyways, or rather "l digress", my next book should be coming out within the next month as well. Hopefully it is much better than the last one, one in which people may actually read. With that being said, or written, hope to show more and expect more changes within these posts and my work along the way. Back to the topic, the office will be the tipping point allowing my fellow peers, friends, and so on to get in on this action as well. My voice actors who understand that I have no money to pay them with. They know I plan on paying them back with bad art and poetry. Thank you and good night.

28 January 2015

ah good

I have just finished my first draft of my book. It sucks when sober, but when I'm drunk, they are totally awesome. Now a book of sorry stories is much easier for me to work on than a full book with so many words and all those letters... though I will admit that it was fun being able to write and publish the first one, to understand who I really am is what my short stories are more about. You'll understand more if you ever read my crap I write... thank you and good night...

27 January 2015

Twitter and Facebook

So, been having trouble with the internet thing that everyone loves so much... stupid thing won't let me change my profile... well anyways, accidentally came up with the name for my next book, ask because I was too drunk to type... note... this is on a real computer and not some touch screen which changes my words all the time...

26 January 2015

yet another update within an hour

Yes. Tis I work yet another up up updates, anyways, just signed up for some sort of thing for money... I love trying to get money for my ultimate plan. If you have my Facebook and or Twitter info to learn my super secret ultimate old an to rule the world.... Anyways, thank you and good night.

not sure

I am not sure if I had access used certain words add the topic of the post so I say this to let you all know. I am afraid of the posts having the same name... Anyways up update number something or other... I have been writing a lot of crap only to find out I suck at it later. Wrote on Twitter, Twitter is not so great. Anyways. Forgot what I was saying. Ummmmmmmm...... update, yeah.... I wrote and am naturally complete at such a task so. Coming soon, my second book about random crap. Thank you...

25 January 2015

issues, yes i am crazy

Well, to start, I have insomnia. Okay so most do because of Facebook and games and whatever electronic crap there is. Anyways, I do not do drugs but I do drink once a week, I mean only Sundays if I think I can afford my whiskey, so when I do not drink I tend to have really vivid dreams in which I have to write in a dream journal. Yes, you two who are the only ones who reads this crap, you can laugh at my imperfections. Anyways, what I mean by vivid dreams, I mean I sleep walk. Basically because of a father figure and babysitters whom were unkind, I have trouble (I base this off of a master's degree in psychology) sleeping at night. I sleep walk, even woke up to me yelling and pounding on the door one... (I do have something to go with all this so bare with me) I write it all down. I wrote a new book that completely sucks... so I have no choice but to look over and rewrite. Anyways, my others I had crazy times about (if that makes sense) I have wrote about. So, I wrote, and wrote, and wrote for years. I am still writing as I find when I place all that craziness into one book. Short stories and poems is what my next book will be. Things that make no sense or differ in view.so far I have 17 thousand words on it and more to come. Will be like my last, but I will all you to tell people about it, and try to by a real copy incase something happens to digital...Thank you and good night

19 January 2015

online dating sites and stuff

So,I tried match.com and it kept giving me an error on my zip code. Either I wrote my zip code in wrong which is highly unlikely, or where I live does not exist. According to my job, it doesn't. So, there goes trying something new until I figure it out or someone outs me at work for my profile or something. 83 thousand words... that's how much I've written so far... none of which is in order. Anyways, I will publish something soon. Got to go now. Bye. And thank you.

18 January 2015

on my mind

I have been writing still, though I know that my first work sucks... Anyways, as I write I wonder if I'll be alone for the rest of my life. I watched my mother get hurt, well beaten, by my father, first person I wanted to be with wanted me to quit my job and live off the government with many children in the house. Second did not have a job or a car, lied about having both and a house and then I later found out they had nothing all the while living off their father who moved out of his own house to get away from his own child. Also had my grandfather look into the background, turns out that person was violent and had several dui's. Also, from the two months I was with them, they killed their dog and cat and blame me for it to make me feel like shit in hopes to get me back. They also sent pictures of their dead animals... Anyways, alone, upset, about to change careers, scared to death. I'm tired of waiting around for someone who would be different than most of these damn people. Why can't I find someone who is not living off of government assistance, who has a job and won't mind paying for dinner once in a while? Everyone who is interested in me seems to not have a job and is on some sort of government aid... I have never needed government aid, not do I wish to be on it. Most of them seem as though they never had a job before... it seems like the only one in my life is my cat and dog and they don't fill the purpose I need...almost desperat enough to try online dating... Lol. .. Anyways, the book. Yes... continuing on work trying not to think about my misery by writing more crap... news and updates later... oh, and maybe the animation and or a live action stupid video thing. Thank you and good night...

10 January 2015


I did not give up on whatever things I've been working on, I have not been working on them much due to certain things such as awful work hours, new games like dragon age and assassins creed and such. I do, however, finally have several volunteers to assist in certain things such as voices... I just hope they say yes once it is ready. With that as the only update in possibly months, unless I get drunk again and write myself a note again but accidentally publish it next time... Thank you and whatever.

10 November 2014

calfaj 2

Completed.... actually, after an edit or more, most likely more because this tablet I still cannot use correctly and refuses to use the words I want... calfaj 2... a link to follow one it is done loading. It is annoying and had little to no effort in creating it... you'll understand if you watch the video for yourself. Lol... I almost forgot, about to enter a video that is considered proof of alien life... Lol.... for footage of the marine base playing... some people may believe it to be aliens, maybe if I had a crappy camera that could not show enough details but unfortunately I got one that shows too much sometimes. Lol calfaj 2 click the link... Lol

02 November 2014

circle k sucks

So, someone had been working on their bass. Expect new stuff on the bass, guitar, harp, and whatever else is used, and the painting has been different. I learned new thing from it, like so so spray paint can be used to create texture... amazing. Anyways, ended up figuring out that all my footage of the painting will be too long for the music, have to shorten to just the painting being made like a time lapse our a slide show over time. May show all work later through progression just like the others. Did not realize how difficult it was to cut my own video down to size. I understand how real directors feel I guess. Had an artist show in town for a few weeks, random stuff. Yeah... Learned new things about my co-worker I am running to become an assistant, I would like to think we could be friends when I leave... oh yeah. She makes more than me now the art she had worked there over three months than me who had worked there three years.... fucking California changing their minimum wage, that and my three month review not going in for over a year, and my only yearly review after three years... reason why I want to leave, I now make minimum while any new person who had been there three months gets a 50 cent raise from the minimum... every where else that is currently accepting jobs is hiring at 20 cents more than minimum. After being lied to, told off, threatened many times by higher ups and forced to work more than six days a week and force to work when sick, I will leave. I have the threatened to sue them many times, have called hr many times who doesn't do shit, they don't care at all. So never work for circle k!!!!! Please, don't ever, unless you are a pot smoking hippy or a drug addict or something. They never drug test....... they will lie to you to make you work, yeah I know most places do, but I was told I would get a dollar raise if I take manager's position but apparently I am not a real manager. I do not get a the raise, I do not get the health care they said I would, I do not get any retirement benefits... basically, I do manager work and threatened to be fired for not working over time for minimum wage with no help from anyone. I have to pay for my w2 because they refuse to send it to my address. never work atcircle k!!! please me, unless they give you the real manager position... thank you. I understand that my words may not be understandable, but like in previous posts I explained that I have no clue how to use a touch screen, or this new computer yet. I will learn soon. Though I can still solve math problems from high school and college.... technology I just cannot accept for some reason....

27 October 2014

no one

No one ever reads this crap... I think that painting is done, apparently not. Need to work around my crappy schedule of one day off a week so instead of being ready within two days, it'll take maybe a month to complete, specially if I keep sleeping until noon on my only day off. Meaning we get four hours of light if lucky after every thing is set up. So still in process. Now to look over the footage to see if it's working so far. Thank you...

26 October 2014


Well, turns out painting takes longer than I thought. Usually a painting, for me, gets done within an hour because I have no pod patience, that one that will be used, so far, had taken an hour to just start. Ran out of battery on the camera and all I did was take pictures. Was so bored, didn't even get to get drunk either... further details and updates as they become available.... thank you...