i just don't know anymore...

So, it all started with my co-worker's death. I cried nearly all work period because of it. Another co-worker came up to me that same day with a fucking smile on his face and asked me out... Inconsiderate little shit doesn't care about anyone but himself... Anyways, my kitty, Titan who I had for nearly ten years, is gone. He's never coming back... My poor puppy, Serenity I had for nearly twelve years, had to be put down do to cancer. And now I find out my brother is dating this whore and I swear if she hurts him the way she hurt my good friend, I'll beat her ass then I'll beat my brother's ass just to prove a point....

I am almost finished with the rewrite of my book, hopefully a final rewrite. I have been working on a script to try and create a cartoon with little success and finally something new I have been working on.

This new project is much harder than I thought it would be like. In fact this may be the only one I do. Hopefully I will actually produce something from it. Anyways very hard and will provide more updates for all those who don't read this carp.

Thank you and good night.

my kitty

My cat is gone. He will never come back. I cried and cried. I don't know what to do so I'm writing my pain away. I miss my titan...

the only home i know

I look out into the world from the confines of my own mind feeling lonesome and concerned for society. I watch the vehicles pass by and wonder if they see the world as I do. The voice deep inside tells of pain and misery but the image draws a different story. It suggests a happier place in which I can roam and be free to live with others in harmony and peace. I try and leave, try and reach the outside but the bars that surround me keep me secure. Then the nurse destroys my fantasy and I must become numb once more with the medication I must take.

im an idiot sometimes

I figure if I Google things like ' my battery is stuck in my car' I'm kind of an Idiot. Well the terminal part is stuck to the battery because of corrosive chemicals and what not...

But anyways...


I have now been, well, nothing. I can say I work nights. I then spend An additional five hours a day, fourteen on weekend's, working on a side project while only sleeping 4-6 hours a day. This is trying to be productive on a project I started with nearly three years ago. No more further details about it. I can say that my books I wrote sick and will be ready to pulish one day hopefully.

Thank you and good night.

cherry lemonade

If I could just stop being lazy and actually do something, I have big plans So hopefully I do do something. Thank you and good night.

quitting

I quit smoking except when I'm drunk. For some reason drunk me likes to smoke. I also quit drinking caffeine, even drunk me can agree to this. Soon I'll quit eating out. Should stop flirting with the lady at Jack n the box anyways I think she's taken since she had not reciprocated any intentions back. It's hard to find someone without using all those apps and what not...

Anyways...

Done playing games for now. Working on my next book as if anyone cares. Need a new battery for my computer before working on animations or music so that will have to wait until I am willing to buy a new one. Meaning I don't care as much as I should, sorry...

Thank you and good night.

sequels

So I have been playing video games and watching movies for a long time...  I understand sequels... They try too hard because the first one worked out, then after the second one bombs they could care less about a third one so the third one works...

What I'm trying to explain is that people should not care as much as they should because people will like them anyways. For instance at work, it is a job in which I must do but the job but as long as it is done I do not care much about anything else and yet people like me. Bassically be yourself and someone will like you eventually, though I'm sure guys only like my breasts... And don't try to be anything your not because it doesn't work. Oh and don't be like my manager, who I don't appreciate not respect and ignore on everything she says, don't stress out on every little thing because it is annoying and it will kill you faster. Oh and don't think of everything as being bad, try and find a positive spun on everything since negativity brings more negativity... Oh and working on some book. Thank you and good night...

addiction

I have recently given into the fact that I have a problem. I am addicted to video games, mainly my xbox. All Microsoft's fault...

Anyways, after my court day, in which it's not my fault this time, I will try and do what I have been wanting to do and that is to finish my stupid book I have been writing, oh and if I am drunk and tired enough I will make a video. Hopefully a music video for that woman's bass thing. I'd call her a bitch but she's been alright lately.

I have weird days off and trying to transition to a normal status is hard. Meaning getting drunk on my days off is different than what it use to be now that I have a job I care about.

So have fun and keep safe. Good night.

plans

So the plans I have which no one cared about... I plan on finding the SanDisk I lost while drunk to finish my next book. I plan on finishing the box project for future music crap. I plan on saving enough money to move to Texas or at least out of. Southern California. I plan on fully quitting my addiction to caffine which is much harder than nicotine. Further updates will come. Anyways have to deal with baby goats, turkeys, bunnies, and a few extra dogs living with me. I love the spring time.

Oh and new job in cosmetics which I know nothing about...

working

I have been working nights now. I have new dlc for a video game I love. These two things I have been doing besides writing. Once I get into the writing again, Maybe after I am finished with my game I will finish the book. June or July hopefully. Maybe that is something I said before and will keep to.

i understand

No sleep for a few days, been working hard in my next projects. By hard I mean I've hand written nearly so much...

Started two things at work with the high school drop out. I've been using big words to confuse the he'll out of her and when she says something I do not care about I say something right back. It pisses her off and yet she has yet to learn to just shut up and do her fucking job. It's like working with a child.

Just venting to no one
 Thank you and good night.

cigarettes and coffee

Okay so there is something wrong with my camera and trying to upload an image. Without being able to show off what it looks like it will be hard to explain... Unless you saw the commercial like creation that was made, I believe, over two years ago.

Anyways, created a layout for the next portion. Will attempt to do something.

quitter damn

So I quit smoking which means something different to me than many others I guess. I still smoke when I drink which is about once a week or when I feel like killing my coworker and she pisses me off much. She called out yesterday because she was hung over and today she wants my sympathy because she had to come in... Okay enough bitching.

Turns out the constant threat of rains may delay the work on my office for the next few months or so. Instead I plan on creating a quick solution to my problem which should work and move my progress along, but not exponentially unfortunately.

Finally, the books I have been working on. Due to my attention span I have been forcing my self to work on them, I just end up working on other projects at the same time. Though I am still hopeful something will be shown by June.

I leave off on one note: if you can't come into work after a night of drinking then may be you shouldn't be drinking. I'm four years older than her and I still pull all nighters and can come to work the next day at four am.

Thank you and good night.

because it's purple

Stopped smoking for now. Almost a week now I think. Been working on the things as mentioned in previous posts.

Now, I have the concrete down for the building for my office. Just need to find or buy the rest of the needed materials for it. Not sure how long it will take, but I have made progress in something.

Also been lying to my co-workers. Told them I had strep throat. It was asthma but now one of them I know for sure is a hypochondriac.

Nothing else interesting going on. To be mentioned later or something.

finally reviewing

Finally finished witcher three for the second time so now onward towards my remaining stuff to do... By the way an awesome game to play.

Two books under review before publication. Currently working an a third, the second portion to "Shot Drunk Tales."

Processing music for a new video that will one day be created for it. Most likely cheaply done and the lyrics make no sense to any one.

Currently dealing with shit at work, for instance the ten to twenty hours of overtime a week. It has its ups and downs...More to come later... Thank you.

Additionally:: because of the type of full time job I have, we only have seven employees so when one calls out someone ends up working thier shift and it usually fall's on management, meaning my boss and myself... Last Thursday had someone call out so I worked an additional eight hours that night after a full eight hour shift. I understand I get overtime pay and what not, but since I also work a night job on Thursdays I lost nearly fifty extra dollars If I estimated it correctly.

Now about the books. I wrote one in it's entirety one night and then just decided to do other things like video games. After an intense gaming session for achievements I got drunk and wrote yet another book. Then I wrote yet a third which I later combined into the second thus making it longer.  My plan, currently, is to try and not get distracted while reviewing each one in hopes to publish by June, at leaste one of them. Then the book I am currently working on is an addition to "Shot Drunk Tales" which I hope to make it a full story this time and not a collection of short stories and poems and whatever else... If not then it will have a collection of three to five short stories, hopefully no more.

Finally the music and crappy art video. I am not sure if that will ever be completed and, if so, not likely to be within the year since I am not obligated to create it. If I find time in between my jobs, my writing, video games, and bar time then I will start work on it. As of now, it is currently in pending. Though I did work out how the video, I hope, will look like so I am a small step closer to creating it.

Thank you for reading this if you did so As always... And good night.